May 2008
42 posts
National Spelling Bee Brings Out Protesters Who R... →
Rebecca Dana sums up the latest in an epochs-long, inconsistently waged war for phonetic spellings, warmed over anew by the National Spelling Bee press coverage: A fyoo duhzen ambishuhss intelectchooals, a handful ov British skool teechers and wuhn rokit siuhntist ar triing to chang the way we spel. While this scheme has flaws, such as extant dialectal pronunciation tics, it would flatten the...
“How could we have this stupid idea to believe that it is by working less that we...”
– President Nicolas Sarkozy, upon introducing a draft bill to undo France’s standard, 35 hour work-week.
Male Pattern Weightloss & The Fair-weather Inch
Discussing workout motivation, my philosophy professor once posed the “hill problem” in lecture. He questioned why he (by extension, most of us) could one day be jogging, encounter a hill and charge over it, yet the next day circumnavigate it by the least difficult flat route? Why does a species with such mastery of its individual parts often fail to move the whole with the will? Beats...
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Newsflash: Compensation #1 Reason for Employee... →
The raging capitalists at Salary.com boldly declared “compensation is the number one reason for job turnover,” following their most recent survey. The top turn-over causes read like a who’s who of our Wednesday staff meetings: inadequate compensation lack of career development/advancement insufficient recognition boredom The report cites a third of workers as wanting a 16-30%...
DNA Curve Balls
Between innuendo and jocularities at a weekend BBQ, a fellow guest came upon the topic of sparsely documented DNA idiosyncrasies (not the testing, DNA itself). I was aware testing requires statistical prowess, making misinterpretation a real possibility - especially when the subject can’t afford good lawyers and expert witnesses to refute. I was also aware that while DNA paternity tests can...
The Disappearing Upper Class →
Zephyr Teachout’s post for The Nation’s “Passing Through” series, addressing the vagueness of terming people ‘elite’: “Upper class” is vanishing from our language…In America, we don’t have the upper class, apparently. We have, according to many news reports, “elites”…I recoil against the imprecision of the word...
Watch sharingtime: After reading Jessica’s post, I watched an awful 60 Minutes piece on Millenials (what they’re calling people our age these days). Apparently, we’re spoiled “narcissistic praise hounds” because we don’t subscribe to the exact same ideals our parents did when it comes to work and lifestyle. The part that made me laugh the most was Morley Safer’s face when he questioned the audacity of...
93 Year Old Goldman Staffer Nears 75 Years Service →
Upon accidentally landing a job, albeit back-office, in a major Investment Bank after college, I naturally expected to work my way up and become rich by my early 30’s, retiring to live the Zach Klein life. No such luck…yet. Still, I’ve maintained the notion this isn’t an industry people stalk for more than a score. Then again, there’s Al Feld: Feld started work for...
Q: What if Tumblr crashes? A: Use the API for...
nmook: There needs to be some sort of export/local backup function… chainchewinggum concuring: …the whole reason I started this was as an alternative to a journal…I want to look at both years from now and laugh. Is there a way to backup my site? Enter: Tumblr API. TopherChris can’t be the only other person using it, can he? The Read API loads your posts in XML, up to 50 per page....
Survey: Sleeping Apart Can Save Your Relationship →
From emilyposts:catedunn: “…for the most part, i love sleeping with my boy, but sometimes (like the night before last) it would be PHENOMENAL to have a place to escape to. sometimes the snoring is just too much.” In high school, I found it completely acceptable to sleep on floors, couches, cars, swarms of other people, in odd positions - with girlfriend or without. Even in college, it seemed...
“There would be alot more drinking if it were always Wednesday.”
– George Carlin, on coining the acronym: HSIOW!
Single Woman's Guide to Surviving Recession: Date... →
Today’s AMNY article on New Yorkers coping with economic downturn highlights penny-pinching Amanda Green, 24, a $50k+/yr market researcher: “I used to go out on the town a lot more but I realize I’m happy just eating pink berry and people watching…I’ve upped the dating. I tend to date chivalrous types who can take me out to nice places. It’s helped me survive...
You Think Park Slope is Changing? Let's Talk... →
Like others, I got a rise out of the NYTimes piece on Park Slope’s changing culture. Time magazine’s Postcard: Harlemlooks at another pocket of gentrification in NYC. My grandparents’ generation witnessed Harlem’s transition from Jewish to African-American. The current turn-over may be less along racial lines than financial. Two familiar groups are interloping: young...
“[Practicing law] was remarkably tedious. Look at the O.J. Simpson case. It was...”
– Greg Giraldo, whose education at Regis High School, Columbia University, and Harvard Law School ultimately brought him to stand-up comedy and the Root of all Evil.
“The California Supreme Court has overturned a ban on gay marriage, paving the...”
– AP, [via New York Times Tumbr correspondent noraleah] They just made it with a 4-3 split decision; an appropriately wishy-washy majority for an issue being punted back and forth at city and state levels around the Union. There’s simply no argument from freedoms that should prevent gays from...
Ohio Attorney General Resigns Amid Sex Scandal →
Public servant porks co-worker; shames self, family; resigns under pressure. There are almost enough of these to start an MSNBC ticker under the stocks: …Foley (R-FL-Boys)…Spitzer (D-NY-Prostitute)…McGreevey (D-NJ-Dude)…Dann (D-OH-Subordinate)… Morrison (D-KA-Subordinate)…Murphy (R-YRNF-Raped men)…Craig (R-ID-Stall jockey)…Kilpatrick (D-Motor...
Polar Bears Get Federal Protection →
Secretary of the Interior Luke Wilson Dirk Kempthorne plans to hold a press conference to: explain what the Department of the Interior does announce Polar Bears are now being protected as a threatened species, one step below ‘endangered’, due to melting polar ice caps/global warming. I can’t wait to see what Stephen Colbert, and oil companies, do with this…
CNN: Majority of Dems want Clinton to be V.P. →
I previously pitied the lack of a President/Prime Minister structure in American government. This uncomfortable Democrat duo are uniquely qualified to divvy the rhetorical and practical executive tasks. Without such a configuration, I don’t think putting Clinton on an Obama ticket is wise. Assuming it somehow happens, leaving aside the candidates’ motivations, there are some positives...
White Collar Unemployment
Bubbly, 30ish Brunette, sees old friend on subway: Hi!!! How are you? What are you doing these days?
Extremely attractive, pant-suited Blonde friend: I don't do anything.
Brunette: You aren't doing anything?
Blonde: I'm not doing anything. [Explains about layoff...]
Brunette: Neither am I! [Ditto; enthusiastically.]
Blonde: I guess we should do lunch!
Brunette: Yea... [Mutual laughter]...
Stay-At-Home Moms' Work Worth ~$117k/year →
“If a stay-at-home mom could be financially compensated, she would bring home nearly $117,000 a year.” - AP More long-winded coverage here, plus the original survey at Mom.salary.com, including the Mom Salary Wizard. In two truncated careers on either side of a decades-long period raising Sasquatch and keeping up a home, I doubt Mom saw more than a fifth of that - not that she’d...
The Five Stages of Drinking
Apropos of this, here’s a classic drinking comedy bit by Larry Miller. I highly recommend his MP3 version. LEVEL 1: It’s 11:00 on a weeknight, you’ve had a few beers. You get up to leave because you have work the next day and one of your friends buys another round. One of your UNEMPLOYED friends. Here at level one you think to yourself, “Oh come on, this is silly, why as...
“I think men are obsolete to some extent. I was going to do a film called...”
– Jay Roach, in NYT Magazine’s Questions page.
“I don’t feel safe with just a knife or pepper spray…Once we get the...”
– Laura Elizabeth Morales, U of Texas at San Antonio student, member of Students for Concealed Carry on Campus.
When Did Peggy Noonan Become Such a... →
(via citizen) I’ve posted some of Noonan’s recent stuff - quality commentary. This time, I’ll let her quote from the delightfully sassy Donna Brazile (in response to Paul Begala’s race-baiting) do the talking: …we need to not divide and polarize the Democratic Party. . . . So stop the divisions. Stop trying to split us into these groups, Paul, because you and I know...
On-the-Fly License Plate Fraud in China, 800¥ to... →
“Speeding drivers in south China are getting clear away thanks to machines which switch the numbers on their licence plates in seconds, state media said on Tuesday.” - Reuters I’ve read London has similar problems with drivers beating the camera-enforced congestion fee by stealing plates. I suspect it would’ve been only a matter of time before the problem struck New York...
“The flaw inherent in seeking consistency or systematization is that you place a...”
– Sydvish’s Boss
$9+ Packs of Cigs In NYC Just In Time for Summer
Today’s WSJ opinion section discusses the relationship between cigarette taxes and organized crime (other, more detailed research here by the same author). Given that everyone I know here knows someone who’s seriously considered renting a truck to bootleg cigs from the South, that crime connection isn’t as surprising as the recently increased tax-burden: On April 23,…Gov....
“A 2006 University of Minnesota poll found that atheists are the most distrusted...”
– David A. Niose, “Humanists Come Out Against Bias”, MetroNY
Viagra Could Cure Jet-Lag, Leave You Jumbo
“A study in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (via the New York Times): sildenafil, otherwise known as Viagra, is a bona fide cure for jet lag. At least in hamsters, that is…The researchers found that Viagra has the ability to alter hamsters’ internal clocks (their ‘circadian rythms’).” - the Economist. Unfortunately for late-night...
“There are many points of view that do not deserve a ‘fair hearing.’”
– Nora, dropping science. I’m a big believer both in the freedom of speech and the disentitlement to unsupportable opinions.
FBI Raids Special Counsel's Office After Chief... →
Putting aside my disappointment that this ‘raid’ involved neither drawing guns nor kicking in doors - it’s high drama when one of the Federal Government’s top watch-dogs is implicated in corruption. The Office of the Special Counsel is “a first line of defense against fraud and mismanagement in government.” While “under investigation himself since...
Fashionable Fat Guys Are Waddling Into Mainstream...
Having come a long way from the days of providing floral-print ponchos and dress capes to men who could single-handedly fill clown cars [see picture], the Big & Tall fashion industry now struggles to narrow it’s target market and sartorial bearing. It’s an issue near and dear to my heart. As a robust man of six and a half feet who, weighing almost two PeterWKnoxs at my peak...
Making Light of Layoffs
I’ve mentioned previously that my employer’s among those laying off thousands because our finance nerds were caught as flat-footed as most others during the mortgage crisis. We back-office peons were tipped off that the next few thousand sackings come tomorrow and Wednesday. Naturally, the atmosphere’s grim and everyone is anxious. The office is rife with rumor, spreading quickly...
“What should really trouble us about sex work? That it is sex that these women...”
– Martha Nussbaum, “Trading on America’s puritanical streak.” (via debauchette) I’m glad to see, should the continuing layoffs in my industry ensnare me, the erudite Ms. Nussbaum supports my fallback profession. Beats studying for the CFA.
US Census Conducted With iPhones?
The Census Follies discusses the Census Bureau’s high-profile, $3 billion dollar failure developing a $600 hand-held device to modernize census taking. The ultimate reason, accompanied by no heads rolling, was given as something like ‘failure to convey requirements to the vendor,’ Harris Corp. I’ll say! Senator Tom Coburn (R-OK) who loves busting pork second only to busting...
Arizona Judge Rejects RIAA's Copyright...
U.S. District Court Judge Neil V. Wake denied the RIAA’s request for a summary judgment against a couple who had copied music files from their CDs onto their computer and downloaded file-sharing programs. [More] Affirming this would create a good common-sense precedent favoring music consumers. The ruling obviates assertions that merely making files accessible equals piracy. This is...
